How To Get Your Ex Back

This is how to get your ex back after they broke up with you.

If you have been broken up with, it is likely that you are experiencing anxiety, panic, shock, sorrow, desperation, and hopelessness.

People often report loss of appetite due to the discomfort and anxiousness that these feelings cause, often resulting in nausea.

Because of the severity of emotions after being dumped, many people in your shoes feel that their situation is uniquely awful.

People experiencing the pain of being dumped often think that their situation is worse than all or most of the breakup situations out there.

I certainly understand why you feel that way, if you do.

It feels so horrible and terribly unique in terms of how it affects you that it seems like no one else could possibly be going through this or that most people don't go through this kind of pain from a breakup.

I usually tell people in your shoes that other people experience similar levels of pain and sorrow after a breakup.

However, I also tell them that people in this kind of pain and sorrow very often get back together with their ex as well.

I'm blessed to see people get an ex back every single day!

How To Get My Ex Back

Every day I get an email, a comment on one of my YouTube videos (SUBSCRIBE here), or someone schedules a coaching call to tell me that their ex came back to them.

want you back

I have a unique vantage point because of the number of breakups I work with.

So I can tell you that the short answer is that, yes, there is hope to get your ex back.

My optimism on people getting their ex back is not because I'm a "pie-in-the-sky" type of guy.

It's because I've seen so many success stories that now I expect most cases to work out if my strategy is followed.

The bottom line is that if you two had a good relationship, if there was chemistry, if you enjoyed each other, and if you didn't respond too poorly to the breakup, your odds are good to get your ex back.

If you responded poorly to the breakup but had those other positives, your odds are not as good as the example above, but they still are solid.

I can show you how to get your ex back.

How To Get back With Your Ex

The No Contact Rule alone increases the likelihood and the level of hope to getting an ex back.

It's just such a powerful thing that most people so often underestimate and overlook.

It's not just a way to get your ex to miss you, it's also a way to prevent you from making mistakes, from keeping them from being pushed away from you by the wrong kind of pressure, for them to see you has having the ability to stay away from them, and a way to get them to see that you could move on which would mean that they could lose you.

Those things work on the mind and heart of your ex and can help to resurrect emotional attraction - the core reason your ex broke up with you in the first place.

hope to get them backI Want To Get Them Back

If you stay strong, focused, and determined, you give yourself the best chance and greatest hope of getting your ex back.

It's when people lose it and break no contact that they can delay their ex from coming back or even prevent it entirely.

If you have broken no contact, get back on the no-contact wagon and stay there! You still have hope, though you might have hurt your odds a bit.

The reason for that is because by you breaking no contact, your ex is reassured that you will wait around on them, that you can't stay away, and that you aren't moving on.

They will likely doubt your ability to do so.

Not only will this give them relief because they realize that you are there waiting as a backup plan should they ever change their mind and heart, but it also removes the positive pressure that was probably on them during no contact.

That positive pressure was allowing them to see that you could move on and that they could lose you forever if they don't act.

Your best hope is to push through and remain committed to no contact.

The best part about no contact is that it is sneaky. Your ex doesn't see it coming.

What Your Ex Goes Through Before They Come Back

You want to know how to get your ex back.

In fact, you want to know the best way to get your ex back.

That's what I'm going to share with you.

So read slowly and carefully.

First, I'm going to tell you something about reuniting with your love that you probably won't like hearing at first.

After the breakup, your ex starts off in a stage of relief.

He or she was able to do the difficult, awkward task of breaking up with you and they are relieved that it is over and done.

So they enjoy feeling that it's over and that it's time for them to move on with life.

This stage usually only lasts for a few days or a couple of weeks.

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, your ex starts to be curious as to why you haven't reached out.

Your ex wonders why you haven't fought and chased them, begging them to come back or to give you another chance.

That's when your ex will likely become concerned or even afraid.

The reason for their concern is that if you aren't chasing them, their mind jumps to the conclusion that you are moving on.

Or, worse, that maybe there is already someone else.

But pay attention to this part:

I’ll take a second to say that you shouldn't take pictures of yourself with a potential romantic partner and post it all over social media in hopes that your ex will see it, get jealous, and come running back to you.

It rarely works like that and is certainly not the best way to accomplish that.

Usually they don't want to face what seems to be an obvious rejection if they try to come back to you while you are with someone else.

So don't fall for what I call a vengeance strategy.  It's just not effective.

Read more about stages that your ex goes through during no contact.

How Fast Can You Get Your Ex Back?

It's important that you realize that getting your ex back will often be a case of taking two steps forward and one step back.

It's not going to happen over night because the breakup itself didn't happen over night.

Remember this:

Breaking up with you was likely something that your ex was considering for a while unless a major event directly caused a quick breakup.

As long as you are showing strength, respecting your ex's decision, and giving them the breakup without them feeling you are "trying" to get them back, you have good reason to have hope that your ex will come back because you are doing it the best way possible.

Trust the process, believe that you are enough without having to come up with excuses to reach out (because it's unlikely to be effective anyway), and that the principal of scarcity will likely result in your ex missing you (if you stay away) and this will help you win your ex back.

Stay strong and remember that even though it feels as though there is urgency to get your ex back at this moment or else you will lose him or her forever, it's simply not true.

It's not as hopeless as it feels.

It's important that you take things one day at a time and remember that the future is wide open.

As long as you and your ex are still alive, there is a path to the two of you being together.

It doesn't have to happen today in order for it to happen.

You probably can't get your ex back today, but you can push them away which, obviously you don't want to do.

So prevent yourself from reaching out and communicating with them from a place of desperation, emotional panic, or anger.

Demonstrate grace, maturity, and strength so that in the coming days, months, and even years, your ex will look back on you positively.

That way, as your ex reflects and considers your place in his/her life, the door will be open for them to realize their mistake in leaving you.

It's a powerful thing but something that requires discipline, maturity, and confidence in the process.

To learn from my two decades in the relationship-recovery service, get more information on my highly effective Emergency Breakup Kit.

-Coach Lee
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